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Monday, July 19, 2004
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It's a mixed kinda feeling when you are put in a fixed position... you know the kind of position where you wish you could really help your loved one but actually there is nothing you could do...
Except perhaps be a listening ear. But being just a listening ear makes you feel even more weak inside... even more helpless...like how do you know just listening to their cries...just wiping their tears will heal all the pain? Or even some pain? Just some?
And the worse part...is to see them draw such a perfect smile on their face...to let the entire world know they are totally ok...And yes the world too believes...
It takes a totally close person to know the meaning of that smile...Perhaps someone more than close...more. Just like the way someone discovered my feelings through my smile...I was able to do that too back to the same someone...
It hurts so much.
For You,
I want to help you, so please be honest with me. When you need anything, ask me. Don't ever think that I will shun away...Never! I have told you before that I am willing to share your sorrows...after all you are part of my life now. And yes, if there are ways for me to help pls let me know...DON'T tell me that there is nothing I can do or that the situation cannot be changed and you just have to live by it and whatsoever of the same kind...
I want to see you walk through the obstacles with strength and grow within them... But I wish to be there to pick you up if you fall... even if it is over and over again...I want to be there. Even if you get tired of falling, I want to be there to encourage you... And no I will never get tired of picking you up... Trust me...
As you do your part to overcome the odds...remember to keep your faith in God...HE is always there...forever...no matter what! And I will pray...
No, that trauma you faced was not easy,
And God wept that it hurt you so;
But it was allowed to shape your heart
So that into his likeness you'd grow
- The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren
And despite all these words...it still hurts... I wish I could do something... Perhaps change the situation...but I know I can't...
So I whisper...
Hear the voice, Oh lord
Of this little girl
Crying in pain
Looking out of the windows
For a perfect tomorrow
Wishing for a turn of events
To the brighter side
Holding my hands
Tightly, I witness her fear,
Her sadness
As tears flow down
Even as she smiles
Yet she claims she is okay
Refusing to accept her pain
No, refusing to upset me
I give her a hug
Telling her what God told me
"Everything will be okay,
Hold on...just for another time"
As I lay my fingers on her cheeks
To wipe her tiny diamonds
So precious they shouldn't fall
Lord...
I call out your name
Is there nothing I can do?
Give her strength
And your forever love
As she prepare herself
For another test
Let her know, Lord
That no matter how winding
The road will be
I am always here for her...
And together we’ll be guided
By You...
I am here for you ok? Always... if you are sad, cry... you don't have to smile so that I don't feel upset... Just cry...let it all out. Don't wear a mask in front of me at least... It makes me feel that I can't help you...It makes me feel disappointed with myself...
__________-HER-__________
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"Some
people plant in the spring,
And
leave in the summer.
If
you're signed up for a season, see it through.
You
don't have to stay forever,
but at
least stay until you see it through."
~
Jim Rohn
From Priya's entry dated 6 November 2005- suits us
perfectly.
!SPRING!
!AUTUMN!
!WINTER!
Azizah
Edleweiss
Haider
Hana
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Izad
Jessica
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Lavan
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Yi Qian
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